A Tale of Two Countries: WallMartia and Wholefoodia.

Once upon a time, there was a country, whose denizens were pretty poor, that the only store they could afford to buy, was Wallmart. They loved attending these stores so much, that eventually they would be nicknamed as Wallmartians. Some of the stuff that they bought there made them rather bulky, some clothes were not that flattering to the body as they failed to hide the fat accumulation, but other than that, the citizens of Wallmartia were pretty happy with what they’ve got. Older ones in particular, remembered that things could have been much worse.

Eventually, however some bright kids from this country crossed the border and saw an amazing Whole Food store, where food was nicely packaged and organic, where shoppers looked nice and elegant, and drove fancy cars.

“We want something like that, too,”— the young bright kids said. Why can't we have it? Down with Wallmart. Wallmart pulls us down. It destroys our identity. It turns us into ugly Wallmartians. It brainwashes us and it is very bad for environment. Long time ago, all our ancestors all shopped at Whole Foods. But now we've forgotten about it, due to the Wallmart oppression. It is time to go back to our roots: we want to look like our brave ancestors, and we live like the cool and sophisticated Wholefoodians do today.

So these bright kids began to agitate and scream and attack their parents for shopping at Wallmart. Eventually they had enough supporters to set many of the stores on fire. And sure enough, pretty soon they got a moral and financial support from the rulers of Wholefoodia, who saw it as nice way of getting rid of competition. Of course, these rulers didn't mention to the bright kids anything about competition and promoting their own economic interests. They said, that they were just supporting democracy and transparency. That's why dark, murky, and cluttered Wallmarts have to be closed and destroyed.

Pretty soon, there was no more food stores left, and things began unravel fast, but luckily, Whole Food moved in. They build a few very shiny beautiful stores which had all sorts of exotic foods. They build nice roads around their stores. It was expensive though, and very few people in Wallmartia could afford it. Except for some bright young kids who were offered jobs with WF. Soon everyone was looking up to those kids who ate well, looked healthy, and drove decent cars.

We want to look like that too, said the rest. And we want to eat. We just can't subside on the potatoes that grow in our gardens.

So some of those poor and downtrodden formed gangs and began to rob, and torture, and sell others into prostitution. Others began to sell drugs, still some others, found the work as baby sitters, cleaners or gardeners in Wholefoodia.

Eventually, some of those gang leaders made enough money so that they all could eat well, and send their children into Whole Food Universities, where these children could get proper education and a chance of shopping at Whole Foods.

What happened with the rest of the Wallmartia population, how did they survive, remains to be unknown, as there are very few documents left.

The historians are divided in their theories and explanations. One school of historians, known as the realistic school, said, "Who cares." We are interested in tracing the lives of those who shop at Whole Foods, and not of those who used to shop in Wallmart.

Another school, known as liberal, gives a different answer. "With very few documents in existence, it is hard to say for certain, but we are convinced that the country got self-destructed, being incapable of transforming itself into a modern nation capable of shopping at Whole Foods.